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How to make a billion dollars naked

Thanks to the miracle that is the internets it’s not only possible to make a billion dollars, it’s even possible to make a billion dollars naked. In fact it’s probably easier that way.

Gone are the days when making money meant getting dressed and going to a designated workplace to perform some repetitive but essentially productive task. Now all you need to do to make money is talk about yourself on the internet.

To begin with, you’ll need a Twitter account which you can get for free, or which I can provide for a one off fee of $79.95 plus a recurring monthly subscription of $19.95.

To be most successful, you should choose a Twitter name that highlights your ability to create success out of nothing. Something with the words “wealth” or “guru” should be most effective. We went with “wealthguru”.

Next, you’ll need to decide where your chosen expertise lies. If you chose a name like “billion dollars guru” or “wealth maven”, your area of expertise is probably related to wealth generation, whereas the name “spiritualhealer” would be better suited to someone attempting to start their own religion. To boost your chances of making that elusive billion dollars, try to incorporate the prefix ‘twit’ or ‘tweet’ into your name.

Your next step should be to try to gain some followers. This should be easy since you’re the expert in your chosen field. Ideally, to be assured success you should aim for over 9000 followers. Don’t worry if most of them have abandoned their accounts after one month as this is normal.

After you have secured a significant following, the final step is to begin marketing. Once you can do this successfully, you’ll surely make a billion dollars.

Tags: how to make a billion dollars, naked